Friday, 22 March 2013

3 Year Old Boy vs 3 Year Old Sharks

To celebrate his birthday in style yesterday (more to follow on that - obligatory cake photo etc) boy no.4 really pulled out the stops.


He's bored, stuck inside all week while his brother complains that things are touching his chicken pox spots. We've missed all the super exciting parties and groups just before the Easter break, the weather has been dismal and we're all full of colds, so it's been a bit pooh.

I went to answer the door to boys no.1 and 2 who were coming back from the Dentist. Seriously, how long does that take? They live here, I only opened the door! I returned to the living room and what greeted me was this...


That is 2 full pots of fish food in a fish tank - this is enough for 6 months, it will kill them.

I spent far longer than I'd like rubbing my head trying to think what to do next and wondering if it would look better if I left the room and came back. I tried a few times just to be sure, but it didn't (damn it).
Organising my head, then 10 minutes running about like a crazy thing trying to find the bucket to put the fish in with absolutely no success. Why is it that you trip over something every day for weeks, and then as soon as you REALLY need it, it's gone? I finally spotted a plastic tub which would do just fine (and the Playmobil is handier when it's chucked out onto the floor anyway).

The fish we have are Silver Sharks. They're not small, they're very quick and they can jump about 30cm. I haven't had to catch them for a while, but it's a 4 handed job. Lacking the extra appendages of an octopus I passed the job on to boys1 and 2 while I sat on the floor ready for the inevitable catch. Stunningly this did not happen. Remember that fact because it's a moment to be proud of in this story - we never once dropped a fish.

We now have the fish decanted into the Playmobil box and the task of emptying the tank is underway with jugs and the household 'sick bowl' because that's the closest we can find to a bucket. There's a trail of water the full length of the house because naturally the best place for a fish tank is at least 100m from the nearest sink or drain. Boy no.4 is having a whale of a time (excuse the pun). This is THE most exciting thing that's happened all week, he can hardly contain his excitement and is desperate to join in. He's running about laughing with spoons and beakers dipping them into anything he can find.


Boy no.3 obviously feels a bit left out by all the attention the fish and his brother are getting, but hasn't the energy to join in, so he secures his position in the pecking order by lying down in the middle of the living room floor and going to sleep.

Boy no.4 is bored with being told off and manhandled away from the action, his brother can't even be suitably poked any more and decides instead to help by getting us some more water for the Playmobil box. He uses the water dispenser on the fridge and the biggest beaker he can find, with which he manages to jam the switch. Water cascading down on him isn't his favourite, so he takes all his clothes off and comes back to harass us again instead. Fortunately boy no.1 spots the new indoor swimming pool before it reaches the edge of the lino, removes the beaker and starts mopping. Doorbell rings. Ah, yeah, Tesco.

15 minutes later we have £200 of  food balanced on the kitchen table, sopping floors throughout, Silver Sharks in a Playmobil box full of tap water, 10 quids worth of fish food goo blocking the drain, a 3 year old birthday boy wearing only a Mike The Knight helmet (presumably to protect him in case of another indoor shower) and a 4 year old with Chicken Pox asleep in the middle of the living room floor. 2 fed up teenagers and 1 Mum who is wondering if there can be any job harder in the entire world than that of parent.

My partner comes home from work...."so, how's it going?".....



I've cheekily added this to Actually Mummy and Just a Normal Mummy's 'What's So Funny?' linky - although it was us asking the question and him answering....

Wot So Funee?

30 comments:

  1. lol!! shouldn't laugh cos you must have been quite stressed out but the way you have described it is hilarious. hope u have everything under control now :)

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    1. Well the fish are in the newly clean tank and so far we have a 100% survival rate. It's been a lot calmer today too! Glad it made you laugh :D

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  2. Glad you all had a good day. :-)

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    1. Oh yeah, especially boy no.4, he had an amazing day. I didn't even mention it but he helped himself to a bite out of most of the shopping while it was on the table :D

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  3. LOL that is too funny. Sorry, obviously not for you but it did make me chuckle.

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    1. That's fine. I can smile about it now....just as long as the fish are still okay tomorrow ;)

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  4. Oh my, what a chaotic day!! Hope today has been a little less manic for you. :-)

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    1. Today has been an absolute breeze in comparison - thank you :)

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  5. Don't laugh, don't laugh, don't laugh...oh, I'm sorry. I can't help it! That's one of the funniest things I've read in ages and the photos make it even better. You can tell you're a blogger when you stop to take photos before rescuing the fish!

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    1. Hahaha...it's terrible isn't it! Glad it made you laugh :)

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  6. oh gosh! Erm... happy birthday boy no. 4?! Bet he'll remember that birthday, glad you can laugh about it and hope the fish (and the carpets and the lino... ) are ok now?

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    1. Well, touch wood/rabbits foot etc the fish are still swimming and seemingly happy this lunchtime. We wisely made the decision a few years ago to cover our parquet wooden block flooring with rubber matting, so it's looking all good! :)

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  7. Sorry I shouldn't laugh but I couldn't help it, you tell it so well! Home your house is back to a bit more normality now!

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    1. It's returned to our kind of normal - which isn't that far removed from it was last Thursday to be honest....The fish are still swimming though! :D

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  8. Oh dear! Hope the fish are alright. x

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    1. They are still swimming at the moment :)x

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  9. boys are always up with no good. lol. glad your fishes are well. hope the birthday boy is better now.

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    1. He's the little one and he is the most mischievous of all of them... :D

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  10. Right you've inspired me - I'm totally writing a post about how people should really think twice before becoming a parent. ;)

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    1. Hahahaha..... I even left out the bit about him eating a Lego Ninja head just to annoy his brother...

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  11. Bloody Hell - is it bad I am laughing... ha! But I am sensing the stress too! That sounds like a complete nightmare! I ma terrified of fish so there is no way I would be able to catch a jumping shark thing, four hands or not. Gin in the post to you lovely! #phew x Thanks for linking it up as a #funee! Feel free to grab the badge or blog code and spread a bit of blog love too :))) xxx

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    1. Thank you! As I'm a complete newb I'm attempting to do the badge right now - and I've already checked out some of the others, will look at the rest when I've done the badge.....or not, if that never happens! :D x

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  12. On no, chaos!!
    We had silver sharks and I loved them, would've been just as desperate to sort things out. Xx

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    1. You can't just leave the poor things. They may be fish, but they're still creatures... :D x

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  13. Ha ha - this has happened to me before!! (to a lesser degree mind1)

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  14. Oohps, but looking on the bright side at least it wasn't birthday cake, or play dough or something which might have instantly killed them.

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    1. That is absolutely true! It could have been very much worse :D

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  15. Replies
    1. Hahaha.....I look back and see it as a success. The fish tank is nice and clean and they're still alive at least! :D

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